Moving on from our investigation into the world of our own resilience, this next step may seem simple but actually requires a huge amount of honesty with ourselves. We all have barriers, some are put up for us and others we have put up as ways of coping and protection.
Breaking down the barriers of two of the shortest but most powerful words we use every day to make way for a stronger, more resilient you. Yes and no
The word no has a lot of negative connotations attached to it. Seen as the negative to yes. A denial and restriction. In fact, no is a powerful tool in our ability to harness resilience and inner strength to their full potential. How often have you said yes to something that you didn’t want to for fear of upsetting or disappointing someone? How many times have you said yes to things you didn’t want to because you didn’t want a person to think you are weak or incapable? Connecting to our ability to say no can be one of the most empowering things we can do. Taking ownership of decisions that directly affect us and creating boundaries makes us feel stronger and more in control of our lives. It is like showing yourself the ultimate respect and self-care. Once you begin, it is a revelation and you will wonder why you allowed yourself to say yes for all that time!
Now, we say yes to a lot of stuff that has a positive impact on others. But often the last person we say yes to is ourselves! We deny ourselves things, experiences and feelings all the time, sometimes without realising. Saying yes to your own self-care, happiness and needs take a huge amount of inner strength as it acknowledges self-worth! You are worth the money it costs to have a massage or go on a yoga retreat. You are worth the time for a bath and not a rushed shower at the end of the day. Honestly, you are. In this case, our inner strength looks like compassion.
What do you say yes to without wanting too?
How does that make you feel?
What would the implications of saying no actually be?
Is there a way to say no, or at least share the workload or impact that saying yes has?
How often do you deny yourself of the things you want?
What is it that you deny yourself?
Do you often, or ever prioritise your own self-care and happiness?
How could you?
Is there a balance to be met that allows caring for others but doesn’t sacrifice caring for yourself?
From these answers and the resilience activity this morning, create your own ‘action plan’! Your own how-to guide on breaking down barriers, securing healthy boundaries and tapping into your inner strength in the process!